Choosing My Words Part Two

Choosing My Words Part Two

Well it has been one week since that horrific tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Connecticut. My heart breaks for everyone involved and they continue to be in my prayers. I definitely have many thoughts on why this happened and how to ensure it doesn't happen again. I do believe that mental health treatment in this country needs to be strengthened and the stigmas taken away. But I might have to save that soapbox for another day. I came across this on Face Book yesterday and it just seemed fitting in regards to what I posted yesterday. The things we grumble about are not important at all, but they seem to be the things that take up our time and energy. So please, hold your kids tight, appreciate their innocence, and in all the hustle and bustle of the next few days, please try to take a step back and take it all in and enjoy every moment!!! Happy Holidays to everyone!!!!!

"Another Mother's Prayer" Dedicated to the Newtown, CT Moms

I found a pair of dirty socks on the bathroom floor,
And gave thanks for the sweaty things behind the door.
I turned them right side out and it dawned on me,
From now on, I will, through other eyes see.
For the things that used to make me mad,
Have made me grateful and strangely glad…
The door left open, and the unmade bed,
Crumbs, bad grades and the uncombed head.
The smudges of blue toothpaste in the sink,
Endless questions and uniforms that stink.
The light that’s left on, and the bike that’s left out,
Lost hairbrushes and the Monday morning pout.
Weekend-eating science projects and homework that’s late,
The peanut butter that I have to scrub off the plate…
For sleepovers, Sharpie art, and cavities too,
I will say, oh Lord Jesus, thank You!
From now on I won’t be such a grouch,
About things like muddy shoes and popcorn under the couch.
For now I see… these are blessings in disguise,
Oh God help me to always see everything through Another Mother’s eyes.
WE WILL NOT FORGET YOUR BEAUTIFUL, PRECIOUS CHILDREN!

How We Choose to Talk to Others…Food for Thought for Today

Many, many years ago, I had the great experience of living with one of my best friends. We were out of college, working full time and enjoying life. We used to talk that since we had always traveled so well together, that living together would work out just fine. Which, it did and little did we know that now that we are both married with kids, how much we would miss that little apartment and dreaming of the days of being married with kids. Guess the grass is always greener isn't it? OK  I am getting to the point here. I am now living and sharing my life with my other best friend, my husband. He truly is the one that knows me best and I know him the best out of anyone in this world.

Living with other people is not an easy thing to do at all. No matter who you are, it’s a challenge. But as I look back, I wonder why it was that when I would get irritated with my roommate, I would choose to bite my tongue a whole lot more thank I do now with my husband. For instance if the trash was overflowing in our apartment, I might first see how much more I could stuff into it before having to make the trek all the way across the parking lot to the dumpster to take it out. Sure, I was probably irritated and might grumble to myself a bit, but I would take it out, as it wasn't worth saying anything. Now when the same scenario happens at home, you better believe I am going to grumble out loud and make darn sure that the hubby knows that I’m irritated which will most likely, OK inevitably, and turn into a nice “discussion” about who does more around the house! What that argument really necessary? Nope. Now we are just ticked and it’s not going to be an easy rest of the day. Yes, we might both be a little “stubborn”.

So my question is, why in world do we treat the people we love most in the world not as kindly as the others people in our lives? And admit, I know you do it too! By biting my tongue with my roommate, it didn't cause unnecessary friction, because honestly, I know she wasn't avoiding the trash just to tick me off. And guess what, I really don’t think my hubby intentionally does the same thing just to push my buttons. Why do I take my silly little frustrations out on the person I love most in this world and chose to be nicer to others who might choose to not be part of my life tomorrow? I probably smile at complete strangers in the grocery store more than I smile at my husband some days. That’s not fair to him or our relationship.

My challenge to you, especially in this Holiday season, is that before you open your mouth to your spouse about something related to the above, ask yourself first, “Would I be saying these same words, in this tone, to anyone else in my life”? Good luck and Merry Christmas!!

Disclaimer: To my friend and past roommate; I am sure trash was never an issue, I honestly don’t remember, but using it merely as an example. The two years we lived together and those memories are sometimes what get me through the day with two little ones!!!

And to my husband, please take out the trash so we don’t have to argue about it!! :0)

This Is Just Embarrassing....

Well this is just plain embarrassing and wrong....I just realized that my last post was sadly a few months ago....so much for a weekly update from me!
Well here is to looking forward to a New Year and my greatest intentions ever of updating this at least once a week, and hopefully and I know a bit shocking, but possibly a few times a week. It's amazing what putting things in your schedule will do! I have a lot of new ideas for updates on here ad look forward to both sharing my thoughts with you and continuing to learn from everyone I come into contact with on a daily basis!

Anyway, I sincerely wish everyone a wonderful Christmas and Holiday season! Enjoy your loved ones, eat lots of good food, remember and honor those not with us this holiday and look forward to new beginnings and an amazing New Year that hopefully holds lots o hope for you!

And yes, you will be hearing from me very soon! I am excited about a new year of change!

Time for Adjustment…..

My last semester of college was a cake walk. I took three classes, worked part time and basically enjoyed the last four months of college to the fullest extent. I was fortunate enough to have a job right after graduation. I went from a pretty sweet schedule to being thrown into a job where I actually had to be productive 40 hours a week. I’m not complaining, I loved my job and worked hard at it, but DANG…after those several months of easy street, adjusting to a 40 hour work week was a pretty big deal. I’m sure I slept a little more and needed some extra down time at night until I got in the routine of it and my body adjusted to actually getting up before 10am on a daily basis!

Fast forward a few years, I now have a kindergartener on my hands. She went to preschool for two years prior, going three days a week, and learned a lot and played a lot. This summer I worked less and we played even more. We got her all ready to start school, talking about how fun it would be etc and she was truly excited to start school. The first week went well…the second week, my sweet little girl started some behaviors that were not so pleasant for all of us…We are starting week four and there is still adjustment going on. Like me, the new college grad, she is having to cope with five whole days of having to follow rules, learn, eat in a certain amount of time, do homework etc. Compared to the last five years of her life, this is one heck of a HUGE adjustment! Of course she is going to act like a little booger here and there. She is not capable of saying to me, “Mommy school is really taxing on my brain and energy level so I need to take a little break and go to bed earlier”. Nope, she just knows how to be a booger, which is how five year olds communicate all these new things she is trying to process.  But it’s made me take a step back and be patient with her adjustment and know that she will get in the swing of things and my sweet little girl should hopefully return to normal….hopefully.

Now that school has been in session for several weeks now, I urge parents to consider what all kids need to adjust to with each new school year, not just kindergarten. Getting to know new teachers, new routines, new friends and bigger demands on their brains is hard work. So I encourage you to be there for the kids, encourage them, play with them and hopefully be able to schedule in some down time for them each night. Be patient if their behaviors change just a little…it’s normal. (of course I am in NO way saying that bad behaviors be excused because of this, but to remember, there is probably a good reason they are acting they way they are and not just to make you crazy!)

I hope everyone is having a GREAT start to the school year, before we know it the teachers will be rejoicing for Christmas break I am sure!

And as always, no matter what you are facing in life and need some help, I am here! Call if you would like to make an appointment, as I am here Monday through Thursday! Call me at 636-294-5490! HAVE A GREAT WEEK EVERYONE!!!! 

Husbands, Boyfriends, Significant Others and All You Other Men Out There Trying To Figure Out Women

Okay, I admit, that title might have been a little bit misleading….but sorry men, you will never figure women out and once you think you have, something else will change that, trust me on that one. Anyway, I just wanted to talk about a little know fact that I think most men miss when trying to make the female in their life happy. 

I will try to make this short and to the point. Women just want to be appreciated. Bottom line. Yes, we are brought up to want a knight in shining armor, blah blah blah. But we know that reality steps in and that isn’t what we are going to end up with in the midst of jobs, families, laundry, cooking, cleaning etc. And we are okay with that, we really are. However, in the day to day life that takes over, we just want to be reminded that we are number one in your life.

And here’s the new flash……we don’t need a ten course meal with champagne and roses and a carriage ride to end the evening. And I say that because in talking to my dear hubby and other men I know, that’s what I am hearing. I have heard that men believe that to show their love, that is what it will take to please the woman in their life. Guess what, not the case. Not the case at all my friends….

Stop and buy a $10 bouquet of flowers on your way home from work.

Make an appointment for her to get a pedicure or manicure or something else she really enjoys and force her to leave the house. Bonus points for making that appointment for BEFORE the kids are in bed.

Buy her favorite candy, beverage, magazine etc and leave it in an unsuspecting place that you know she will find. Then leave her alone for 20 minutes to enjoy it.

Stop at Hallmark and pick up several cheap I Love You type cards and give them to her throughout the year.

Turn off the TV and ask her if she would like to do something besides just sit on the couch that night. Take a walk, sit on the deck and listen to music or anything else you like to do together.

My point is, it truly is the little things in life that mean the most. Trust me on this. I dare you all to try a little something this week and see what happens. I think you will be surprised!

Have a great week everyone and I hope to get back on here much more often. Let me know what you think. I don’t get offended easily, so any comments are welcomed. I would love to hear that you think I am genius, I don’t know anything, things you would like me to address on here etc. So leave a comment here, or e-mail me at ldenisonlpc@gmail.com.  Happy Memorial Day to you all!!!!!

This Makes Sooooo Much Sense!!!!

Well, this blog is still around. Again, no excuses on the ridiculous time lapse in posts, but once again, going to make an effort to start updating on a more consistent basis!
I received the link to this from someone I know about teaching our kids about strangers etc. I had one of those, "well duh" moments as it makes a lot more sense to me when talking to little ones about who they need to be aware of etc. I struggle with this topic personally quite a lot as it's such a fine line between wanting my children to be trusting of others, but not TOO trusting. Anyway, hope it's helpful and I hope that you all will hear from me again soon!!!!

http://www.checklistmommy.com/2012/02/09/tricky-people-are-the-new-strangers/

This is For All the Mom’s Out There (Husband’s You Should Read This Too!)

Well, it’s a brand new year once again. Time for making those resolutions that may or may not last and yes, I am guilty of making a few myself and not sticking to them like I should. But what I want to write about today is a topic that has been on my mind for quite some time and wanted to put on here.

When a woman becomes a mom her list of priorities grows exponentially. We love being moms, it’s the best thing in the world to rock a sleeping baby, kiss a boo boo, share in the joys of a game that was won etc. Our responsibilities grow from having more laundry, more shopping, more appointments to remember, and making time for our spouse. But how many of you mom’s out there, add to that list, time for you? Yes, that’s what I said, time for YOU!! Both personally and professionally this is something I hear about on an almost daily basis. I hear that as women, the priority of making time for you is nonexistent. It might happen at some point. Or I hear that there is guilt associated with actually leaving the house to do something by yourself that doesn’t involve helping the family, like grocery shopping or buying the kids new shoes. (Granted personally speaking, going to the grocery store by myself is a treat sometimes!) I became slightly addicted to pedicures when I was pregnant with my second child. It was a welcome treat when it was ridiculously hot outside and I got a little pampering and not to mention pretty toes when the rest of me felt less than pretty. However, every single time I went, I felt guilty. WHY?!?! And I know I am not alone, as I hear the same thing over and over again from other women in the same boat.

Don’t get me wrong, the guilt was all ME! I am so very lucky to have a husband who wants me to get out the house and do things for myself. I hear it from other husbands as well; they want their wives to do things for themselves. However, as I type I have a gift certificate for a massage that is currently collecting dust (that I received from supportive husband) because I have been unable to justify the two hours I would be gone to pamper myself and instead fill up my time with the things that “have” to get done.

It all comes down to this ladies; we can’t take care of those we love, unless we put ourselves first. Our husbands want us to do these things. So I encourage you to make a resolution this year to do things for YOU! I hear so many women say they wish they could go to the gym, get a mani/pedi, have a girl’s night, roam around a book store for an hour, find a new hobby and the list goes on and on. As mom’s we are so good at scheduling everything sometimes down to the minute for everyone else. Therefore, I challenge and encourage you to schedule some time for yourself. Start out small, try once a month for an hour. Leave the house, the husband, and the kids and have some time for you. Leave the guilt at home. Enjoy yourself, as you deserve more than anyone in this world. Being a mom and wife is very hard and in order to do that job, you need to come first sometimes. It might be a little hard at first, but trust me; it will make all the difference in the world.

I would love to hear the things that you are doing for yourself, so don’t hesitate to comment on here, it might push another mom out the door for the time that she deserves. And husbands, leave your comments to, I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic! I think I might log off here and go make that appointment for the massage that is so long overdue!  Happy New Year everyone, I truly hope it is a great year for you!